The other day I was busied and hurried trying to catch a train to the Loop in order to run an errand over lunch. (The Loop is only .5 miles [or less!] from my work but I take the train because? Am lazy!) I was just past the turnstile, when a lady turned to ask me if this was the train that was headed towards the Loop.
Normally, I hate strangers, but this day I was feeling helpful and generally not filled with disdain for my fellow man. (I’ve gone soft!) So I looked up and was about to tell her that yes she was headed in the right direction, but before I could get out that yes a giant ball of spit flew from my mouth.
This spittle took such an exaggerated arch on its way to her forearm that there was plenty of time for our eyes to go from each other to the flying spitwad back to each other.
I was mortified. How do you recover from that?
I didn’t even bother to finish my answer. I didn’t even apologize! Instead, I just ran.
And honestly, I really hope she finally found her way to the Loop, but I will never know. And that’s because I turned on my heels, and headed for the train going the opposite direction and rode it for two stops just to make sure I could put ENOUGH space between me and the embarrassment.
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5 comments:
the only thing worse would have been a projectile sneeze full of green boogs that landed on her cheek.
My sympathies.crazy
that's hilarious. i can totally see the your eyes meeting in slow-mo. :)
it's been to long since you've blogged. get back on the wagon.
I am laughing so hard right now that I cannot remember what I was initially searching for when I accidently clicked on your site.
How great for me! You remind me of when I was single and the unsolicited adventures I ended up with at the end of each day!
I will have to visit again and read much more!
sweet tweets we miss you...this is the office staff at student legal services in texas...our admin ass't is the one who remembered to check in on you, wondering if from the date of the last post you'd quit...we thought you were funny funny funny and hope you're still around....
hambone and eddie
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